dreaming problem

so i finished the dress i was making for my sister. it would not fit over her boobs. it barely fit over mine. and then i was wearing it for like two seconds and the bodice decided to separate from the rest of the dress. and so it is toast. hmph.


well, i started that vest yesterday. and i finished it today. because i'm speedy like that. actually, i just get a new project and devote all my time to it until it's done. i'll even skip meals because i'm so busy sewing in my room. i won't leave all day. anyway, the vest is really really cute. so i'm going to wear it to my friend's concert i think. which is not for like two and a half weeks, but whatever.


last night, i had almost finished the vest, it was like 12:30 am, and i was ironing it, but i had set the iron too high and left it on the vest too long. so the brocade melted. i was like freaking out, i thought i was gonna die or something. i had devoted my life to that thing for two entire days. and it melted. but then, this morning, i realized it was on the inside and i could just live with it. so it's all good.


this morning, i went to a funeral, this woman at my church, who was like 95 or something, died of a stroke recently. she was pretty amazing. she fell but never broke anything, gardened every day, lived alone in her house, went to church every day, bible study on thursdays. and she drove herself everywhere. so she was definitely awesome. but she died about a week ago, and so her funeral was this morning.

after that, i came home and sewed a little bit, i just had to sew on the buttons and bring in the sides a bit, and then i had to go outside and hold the ladder for my father while he cut a dead branch off our oak. he said a dead branch. as in one. he ended up cutting off like fifty bajillion dead branches, so what should have been a twenty minute job turned into three hours. and then he wanted us to pick all the branches, and then mow the lawn. it was infuriating, because my unfinished vest was just waiting for me, and molly was lounging around inside on her laptop. why couldn't she hold the ladder? honestly.

so then i came inside and worked on my vest a bit more, i think i managed one or two buttons, when i was called outside to mow my section of the lawn. so i did that, and then i finished my vest, ignoring the constant calls to come downstairs and make my dinner. a small quesadilla. well i went down on my own time and made my dinner, after finishing my vest and showing it off sufficiently.

i daydream too much. it sucks because i end up talking myself out of my fantasies completely by bringing myself down, and then i'm all depressed and hopeless and i've taken all the fun out of spacing out, which is what i do best.

i am the space-out queen. make my statue silver.

well, i think i want ice cream now. i shall return. eventually.

"maybe we, why don't we sit right here for half an hour? we'll speak of what a waste i am."

-underoath, writing on the walls